What Lane Kiffin’s Decision Teaches Coaches About Purpose-Driven Leadership

The sporting world watched with interest over the past six weeks as Lane Kiffin, former head football coach at Ole Miss, went through a very public game of “The (football) Bachelor”. The saga dominated sporting news as we all watched and wondered, “Will he stay or will he go?” At the center of it all was Kiffin, a coach with a history of drama and a proclivity for seeking attention with little regard for how he does so. During this episode, Kiffin had three very appealing options to consider:

1. Accept the head coaching job at Florida.

2. Leave Ole Miss for LSU.

3. Stay at Ole Miss and continue building what he started.

As we all know by now, he decided to leave Ole Miss to take over at LSU. My question: why?

The Kiffin Saga: Transparency, Questions, and the “Changed Man” Narrative

One thing that stood out to me about Kiffin was his relative transparency. Kiffin’s openness was refreshing; there are countless examples of coaches publicly declaring their allegiance to their current program, only to abruptly take another job elsewhere. Kiffin didn’t do that. Instead, he acknowledged he was considering other options.

Notably, all of this happened not long after ESPN released a documentary showing Kiffin as a changed man, someone who had moved past the mistakes and instability of his earlier career. The film focused on his growth, his attention to health, and his commitment to his family.

Were those changes real? Maybe, maybe not. No one outside his inner circle can say with confidence. I don’t know Lane Kiffin, nor do I have any insight into how he ultimately decided to leave Ole Miss. It does point to a dynamic that is prevalent among coaches more broadly, however.

Across the country, coaches face similar professional decisions every off-season (or have those decisions forced on them) about whether to stay in their current job, interview for the next one, seek promotion to the next level, or leave coaching altogether. Commonly, emotion and ego influence these decisions, rather than an intentional sense of purpose.

No matter how you feel about him, this moment captured a universal leadership challenge: When the next step isn’t obvious, how do you make the right choice? When every option appears good, how do you choose the one that truly aligns with your core purpose? For Kiffin, his public declarations of commitment to health and family seem to run counter to his decision to go to LSU. This decision implies he chose it for the availability of resources and the increased chances of winning a national title.

When your purpose isn’t clear or doesn’t match your actions, decisions become driven by emotion instead of principle. Only by anchoring your choices to your purpose do you ensure proper alignment with your values.

Purpose Is More Than a Slogan. It’s a North Star. (And Many Coaches Don’t Have One)

“Find your why” is one of the most overused phrases in leadership. You see it on walls, in books, and in pre-season speeches.

But very few leaders actually live by a clearly defined purpose, and even fewer use it to guide their most significant decisions.

Your purpose influences three things more than anything else:

1. What you prioritize

2. What you tolerate

3. What you choose

Without a clear purpose, everything can seem like either an opportunity or a threat. With an anchored purpose, every decision becomes directional rather than emotional.

My Experience: How Purpose Changed the Way I Made Decisions

It took me years to figure out my own purpose. I spent years leading, failing, thinking, and improving. But once I finally named it, every big decision felt lighter, clearer, and more in line with who I am.

When I faced decisions that carried real implications for my Soldiers, my family, and my own future, I relied on a simple checklist I built:

• Was it the right thing to do?

• Did I act according to my values?

• Was I honest?

• Did I act with charity and treat the other with dignity?

• Did I separate emotion from rationality?

This wasn’t just theory. It was something I used in real life. It kept me grounded when emotions were high, tethered my actions to my principles, and kept me from making choices that seemed good but weren’t right for me.

Purpose is the only antidote to drift.

Kiffin and the Purpose Gap

Rece Davis summed up the conflict well during the College Gameday podcast:

“Stop talking about pouring into young men.”

He wasn’t criticizing Kiffin. He was pointing out the gap between what Kiffin said his purpose was (developing young men) and what his actions showed (trying to get the best chance to win a national championship).

This isn’t about whether Kiffin made the right decision; it’s about whether his decision matched his stated purpose.

Purpose gives leaders clarity. It removes ambiguity, reduces indecision, and closes the gap between what we claim to value and the choices we make. It’s the foundation for consistent decision-making.

When a coach says his purpose is “building men,” but his choices show he’s focused on “maximizing personal opportunity,” people eventually notice the difference.

When people see that gap, trust starts to fade.

The Lesson for Every Coach Facing a Change

Whether you’re thinking about a new job, a conference change, a staff change, or a decision that affects your whole team, here’s the leadership lesson from the Kiffin story:

If you don’t define your own purpose, your environment and circumstances will define it for you. To lead effectively, you must take ownership of that definition.

Purpose isn’t about branding, a social media caption, or what you say in interviews to sound noble.

Purpose is the internal compass that tells you:

• Which opportunities are yours

• Which ones aren’t

• Which mountains are you called to climb

• Which ones should you walk away from

  
  

Kiffin had three mountains in front of him. Did he pick the one that matched his purpose? Family, personal ambition, legacy, or chasing a championship? I can only hope so.

The rest of us can debate the optics, but the more important question is the one coaches must ask themselves:

When the next opportunity comes, and it always does, will you choose based on your purpose or your pressure? Your calling or your ego? Who you say you are, or who you actually are?

Purpose doesn’t make decisions easier, just clearer.